7 Mindset Shifts You Need to Make If You Want Decluttering to Be Easy

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A decluttering mindset requires shifting some ideas you might have had for awhile. Try these 7 new thoughts to make ditching your stuff easy.

The older I get, the more I’m convinced that just about everything in life is more of a mental game than a physical one.

Whether I was running a marathon, beating breast cancer, or birthing my babies, I always felt like the process got immeasurably easier once I got my head in the right place.

When I got rid of almost everything I owned back in 2019, it was physically hard, sure. But the mental drama was immense. Whether I was sobbing uncontrollably while saying goodbye to a 40-year-old stuffed animal or beating myself up about all the money I’d “wasted” on a fondue pot I hadn’t used in years, clearing out my clutter brought up all the feels.

I made seven mental shifts that radically improved my decluttering mindset that made clearing the clutter much easier. If you’re in decluttering mode, I think they’ll help you, too.

Objects are not the same as memories

Yes, of course you know this. Intellectually. Until the time comes when you start to think about getting rid of :

• that plastic bracelet your baby wore home from the hospital
• the ticket stub from the concert where you and your husband had your first date in 2002
• that afghan that used to sit on the back of Grandma’s couch but now lives in your linen closet.

Getting rid of these things doesn’t feel like getting rid of old stuff. It feels like somehow letting go of the memories altogether. Some basic part of our lizard brain feels that if we can’t touch this stuff anymore, we’ll lose touch with all those old memories and feelings. 

The good news is that this isn’t actually true. 

The memories will be there whether you keep the stuff or not. 

I promise.

If totally getting rid of stuff like this feels like an enormous step, consider photographing the item so you will still be able to jog your memory with the image of it.

RELATED: 8 Tips You Need to Make Purging Emotional Clutter Easier

If everything is special, then nothing is special

In my house, we repeat this like a mantra. (If you stopped by, you might hear my little boys repeating it in an exasperated tone of voice along with a little eye roll. Seriously. They are practicing eye rolls lately, and they aren’t even 10 yet.)

It’s tempting to save:

• every piece of artwork the kids do
• every piece of your great-grandmother’s china
• every tchotchke from your wedding

When we do this, though, what happens? 

All of these treasures turn into a pile of junk. They sit together in boxes, bags, or piles—hiding in forgotten corners of our homes—or worse, they live right out in plain view, irritating us and making our homes less livable.

What if we instead curated these treasures and chose one little piece to honor?

• Our child’s favorite piece of artwork from the week could live in a special frame on the fridge.
• Great-grandma’s gravy boat could come out the cupboard regularly for Sunday dinner.
• A dried flower from your bouquet could live in a shadow box along with a copy of your vows, hanging where you could enjoy it every day.

Yes, this might require letting go of some other things that feel special. Curating the collection, though, gives more honor to every piece–even the ones you let go of–than keeping the whole set.

More is not better

If owning three Lego sets is good, owning six sets must be better, right? Another sweater in my collection would surely make my winter wardrobe more appealing. Naturally, having more books in my personal library must improve the quality of my life?

Wrong.

Study after study has shown that having more stuff does not make us happier. In fact, it’s just the opposite. Having more stuff creates clutter, which leads to higher levels of cortisol in our blood and a greater feeling of stress. Having all of these choices for what to play, what to wear, and what to read also leads to decision fatigue. 

We wear our brains out trying to make simple choices and then wonder why we feel so worn out. In my own life, I have noticed that my head feels much clearer with a simple capsule wardrobe. My children have a much easier time playing when they’re not confronted with an overwhelming playroom full of toys. 

It feels counterintuitive, but less really is more when it comes to stuff.

RELATED: 9 Easy Tips to Get Rid of Toy Clutter Once and for All

Once a gift is given and received, it has served its purpose

How many things in your house are you keeping because you were given them as a gift? Often we hang onto things we don’t really want because we love the person who gave them to us. Similar to confusing an object with a memory, we sometimes equate an object with a person. 

Even worse, sometimes we keep the item not out of love, but out of guilt or fear. Maybe we feel guilty getting rid of something because someone has spent a lot of money on it. We might feel afraid, for instance, that Aunt Linda will come to visit and ask why we aren’t wearing the ugly sweater she knitted for us. 

Consider this: once a gift is given and received, the process of gift-giving is over. Mission accomplished. Someone expressed love for you (or performed a social obligation, perhaps) and you graciously received what they gave you. 

You don’t have to keep an item forever to prove your gratitude or remind you of their love. Conversely, getting rid of something someone gave you is not the same as shitting all over them. 

If you truly internalize this belief, you’re likely to find many things in your house that can go.

The Money Is Gone Whether You Keep the Item or Not

How often have we kept something because it was expensive?

• The exercise bike we no longer ride
• Our cute designer jeans that don’t fit anymore
• That telescope we bought on a whim which no one has ever used.

The money you used to buy this stuff is what economists call a sunk cost. You’ve already spent this money. You probably can’t get it back. 

Often, though, we leave these items cluttering our closets because they’re “worth something”. The reality is, though, that they are simply making you feel bad–reminding you often of a purchase that you wish you hadn’t made.

Let them go. Whether you sell your item on Craigslist for a few dollars or leave it on the curb with a “Free to a Good Home” sign really doesn’t matter at the end of the day. 

Know that you made the best purchasing decision you could at the time, and trust that the future you will make even better decisions. Don’t waste any more time and energy feeling guilty.

If You Need It Later, You Can Get It Again

Very few things you own are truly irreplaceable. Although even a radical declutterer like me has a few items that are truly special, we could all get rid of most of our stuff and never need it again.

Lots of folks, though get paralyzed by the idea that they might need something…someday. Bloggers The Minimalists have a great plan for this, urging us to keep items “Just for When” rather than “Just In Case”. 

This means that if you don’t have a darn good idea of when you’ll use that item you’re storing, you should let it go.

Trust that the future you will have the smarts, money, and other resources to get whatever you need if you should need it. Release the urge to keep a bunch of stuff in your house as kind of a messy shield against an uncertain future. 

So there you go–7 ways you can improve your decluttering mindset to make the mental game of getting rid of your stuff easier.

Want an even easier decluttering win today? Check out my FREE Declutter Jump Start! You’ll clear out 25 common clutter spots and make a plan to set yourself up for clutter-busting success. Click here to grab it!